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Crises, Peers and Conditioning: Three Roads to Change, Part I

There are three primary avenues to create lasting change in your life. There’s the ol’ tried and true method of it occurring from a moment of Crises (which is common, and never any fun), there is change that occurs from the presence (read: Influence) and pressure (read: Influence) that comes from one’s peers and then there is change that comes from conditioning. Conditioning meaning by making the conscious effort to change one’s habits, by changing one’s beliefs.

And while this is all well and good – how do you know what beliefs need changing? In fact: how do you know what it is you believe?

A good place to start to begin discovering the answer, is to look the following:

[1] Who do I admire enough whose ideas/beliefs about [fill in the blank: money, health, relationship, career, spirituality, success, failure, etc] I find myself in alignment with? (consciously or unconsciously emulate).

“Relationships are hard and tend to not last…” {parent}
“Only the lucky few get to be rich in this life…”
“The men (women) in this family have always…therefore you will….too…”
“The World’s a scary place, filled with danger – be careful…”
“We are not meant to…that’s just the way it is.”

Okay, that list creeps me out and you get the idea. On the positive side:

“If he/she can do it (fill in the blank), then so can I!”
“If you can see it in your mind, you most likely can achieve it”
“One of the main differences between the rich and the poor, is the rich acquire wealth whereas the poor consume (spend) it”
“Value and opportunity is all around you if only you have eyes to see it.”
“Income has little to no bearing on Wealth. Wealth is a mindset.”
and so on…

Whose voice (besides your own) do you listen to the most? The family that you were born and raised in? The “family” you’ve created along the way of life? Are these voices nurturing and empowering you to achieve the success you’re striving for in life or are these voices holding you back, keeping you “safe” from the risk of change?

Whose company are you keeping? Here’s a fun little exercise:

What is your Wealth/Success Blueprint? For a clue: Look whose around you

[1] Make a list of the 4 to 5 individuals who have the most influence, impact and/or importance in your life

[2] Guesstimate their net worth {you can also substitute this with other attributes)

[3] Add them up, then divide by the # of individuals (4, 5, etc) – this is the average net worth of the group

[4] Calculate your net worth. You’ll find that your net worth will be +/- 10% of the group net worth, and if it’s not – it’s moving in the direction of the average.

I know this sounds like a parlor trick, and as bizarre as it sounds – it’s not. I did this little exercise 4 years ago and at the time, the difference between the average and my net worth was VAST and ever year since then both my net worth and my mindset/psychology has rapidly grown closer to this average. We become who we affiliate/align ourselves with, who we spend the most amount of time, focus with & upon. Who are you hanging out with?

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